Noobish avatars

When I started playing SL, I looked like a noob like everyone else...even worse

Freebies were awful and I had few money. 

Then I started earning some cash and my avatar improved greatly!

I said GREATLY!!

But now things are different! You can find even free or cheap mesh clothes or body parts!

But people think that they could show up with "painted" shirt, pants, no shoes and no ao and IM me with "your sexy. come and sit with me"

If you don't care about your appearance, I do! SL and RL are once again different: you can choose to look good. Do it!

And if you decide to be barefoot you're usually a man who thinks that shoes aren't important (why should I bother with shoes? They're not needed for sex!) or a woman who thinks that feet can be sexy. In the 2nd case GET YOURSELF SCULPTED OR MESH BARE FEET!!!

The basic bare feet look like this

Do you really like to look like someone with rhino hooves? A mermaid with seal fins?

And then the ao. Any, free ao is better than no ao at all. The basic SL ao makes the avatar move like he was saying "Hey, look at me, I'm a wardrobe!"

A guy even told me
"I had an ao but I deleted it because if I wear an ao, how people could understand what I'm looking at?"

Tell me, do people really care??

•  8 months old av

This guy manages to smoke weed and vape at the same time

Young girl avatars

Ok, stop with the bullshits.
A lot of men like young girls and a lot of girls like to look young.
There are lots of groups and clubs for older men and younger girls in SL and I believe that disclaimers saying "No kids allowed" must be put somewhere.
But here's the funny part: I've been banned from "Old Grandpa's Home" because they considered me a "child avatar" (I never had a kid shape so it must have been because my avatar wasn't 8 feet tall).
I told them there was no point in running a sim for pedos and then banning all the avatars looking younger than 30 or shorter than a giraffe.
Or I've been banned from "LAR'S *OLDER MEN YOUNGER WOMEN" because my av looked old enough but my ao was too childish.

Ok, let's say that: if you call your sim/club

LAR'S *OLDER MEN YOUNGER WOMEN
Old Grandpa's Home
M+Y - Mature and Young
Lolitas - young /adult/ old  place
***Dirty lolita - Horny 18+ teens and young girls
Daddy's No-Tell Playground
Rock-A-Baby Daddy / Babygirl
FUCK ME DADDY

you want young female avatars in it. All you have to do is to put a disclaimer, like they did in Giggles Beach saying "This is a beach for avatars of all ages, not a hook up place. If you feel harassed, call the staff" and then leave people be. Or, otherwise, run a different kind of club.

Someone told me that the rules became stricter because in Germany you can be persecuted in RL if you have sex with a child avatar in SL.
I don't want to think what they do to german people who play Assassin's creed.

• And then a wild dork appears:

[06:55] Lee Ashley (leeashley.gossipgirl): Just so you know; I've taken your picture, and I'm reporting you to both the management here and Linden Labs for Ageplay. I suggest you poof quickly
[06:56] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb): thanks for the info

• Is he serious?

I was discussing a ban I received from a nude beach and the member of the staff looked at my groups and said:

[2016/07/10 01:59]  XXX: horny female masturbation humpers! - not bannable but on a family beach???
[2016/07/10 02:00]  XXX: jaibail babysitters .....
[2016/07/10 02:00]  XXX: not te best profile for a beach with kids etc

Sorry? Are you real with this?
Does he really believe kid avatars are controlled by kids and you need to protect them? Doesn't he really know every nude beach for all ages is just A PICK UP POINT?? Maybe I should tell him how many times those "kids" asked me for sex, even those with pacifiers or diapers.
I agree with following LL rules to protect the sim but you must be either naive or hypocrite to say "not the best profile for a beach with kids"

• Maui swinger fascist camp

I had the privilege to join Maui Swingers Group, paying 300L (because it's sooo exclusive). Nice place and the people seemed nice too.
After few days:

[2017/08/12 09:10] HellsX Resident: Astra, I hate to bother you but your avis looks a bit too young to be here at Maui. Three admins have already gotten complaints from the guests
[2017/08/12 09:11] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): omg really??? I'm taller than 160! I'm not wearing child clothes,,,
[2017/08/12 09:11] HellsX Resident: You have been ejected from 'Maui Swingers Resort' by HellsX Resident.
[2017/08/12 09:11] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): not even the time to answer, thank you.

I complained with the owner and got my membership back.
Some days after that:

[2017/08/23 21:41] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): hello!
[2017/08/23 21:41] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): I wanted to let you know that some people had  complained about you "skipping" around the sim like a little child
[2017/08/23 21:42] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): I've never seen you doing it, but I wanted to let you know
[2017/08/23 21:42] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): look at me
[2017/08/23 21:42] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): this?
[2017/08/23 21:42] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): that is not a child skipping
[2017/08/23 21:42] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): thank you
[2017/08/23 21:43] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): yeah
[2017/08/23 21:43] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): they also said they thought your avi is child like which I don't get at all
[2017/08/23 21:44] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): I don't really know!! I like pigtails but well...
[2017/08/23 21:45] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): it says right on your profile you don't do age play

good, sorted with the owner! I hoped it wouldn't happen again...
but then...

[22:59] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): please  don't float
[22:59] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): thank you
[23:00] Astra et Luna (parvati.silverweb): omg it's just my ao that has a couple of floating animations in it
[23:01] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): yeah
[23:01] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): and its only my dislike for floating that had me ask you to stop
[23:02] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): feel free to float all you want someplace else
[23:02] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): You have been ejected from 'Maui Swingers Resort' by Bandor Beningborough.

ok, dear mr Mussolini, enjoy your lil fascist camp where you need to be all clones 3 meters tall with DD cup and mesh muscles. You didn't complain about my appearance or floating when...

[2016/11/10 20:54] Bandor Tyrell (bandor.beningborough): i could spend the next 10 minutes going down on you ;)

Fuck & Run

Men usually lose interest after orgasm, expecially on SL, where they don't have, in most cases, any love bond with the partner.
When the had what they wanted, how to get rid of the horny chatterbox holding them between their legs?

First, you can see it coming: some start changing poses madly, others go quiet, others... well... start typing.. things!

"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah"
"ooooooooooooh"
"uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh"
(yes, some use all the vowels)


"cumminnnnnnnnnnng"
(I'm glad you have the control to actually type it)

"jhhffujfkuttutuktutudku"
(hitting the keyboard would be appopriate)
And now? Sweet talk? Another go to let her cum too? Aaaargh!

• 14.4 modem syndrome

They go quiet for a while, send you a friendship request and then log off.
I usually wait few minutes for them to come back. They usually don't.
And I usually mute them to avoid the usual "Sorry dear, I crashed last time. Why don't we start again?"

• I forgot I had to go to the dentist's

After the white/sticky fireworks disappear from the sky, they tell you "Sorry, I didn't realize it was so late! I've to be in Gotham city in 10 mins! May I add you? I am the night!"
I usually don't answer to these ones. Let her go and don't accept the request.

• I'm 40, live with parents and they forgot to knock first

Like the ones above, they just spam a friendship request and say "Sorry, rl" and jump into hyperspace.

• Hey, at least I'm clean!

Those often deserve a 2nd chance: they cum and say "I made a mess, time to clean/shower!"

• Hestuck

[00:50] Cherubim (parvati.silverweb): let me guess: orgasm and SL crashes
[00:50] Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich): lol
[00:51] Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich): i was ejected
[00:51] Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich): tp me back pls
[00:51] Second Life: Teleport offer sent to Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich)
[00:53] Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich): grrr imstuck
[00:53] Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich): im must relog
[00:53] Dr. Ulich (martin.ulich): sorry

• M5S

[03:27] FiveStarsMovement: niente male per essere la prima volta :)))
[03:27] Cherubim (parvati.silverweb): :)
[03:28] FiveStarsMovement: ora devo andare a pranzo
[03:29] FiveStarsMovement: che gia rompono
[03:29] FiveStarsMovement: lol
[03:29] Cherubim (parvati.silverweb): si ok, ciao

Perchè frequento solo sim straniere...

Alcuni mi chiedono perchè giro solo sim straniere, invece che passare più tempo con i miei connazionali..
Perchè amate così tanto lo spam e le gesture???
Non si riesce a stare 10 minuti in una sim italiana senza dover mettere in muto almeno 3 persone!!

Poi, dopo 2 parole, subito "Qui c'è lag, andiamo altrove?". No, non è vero! Non c'è lag! Sto bene qui!

Imparate l'inglese, accidenti! Siamo nel 2014, il paese sta andando alla malora e c'è ancora gente che quasi si vanta di non parlare inglese. I più poi usano quei fantastici traduttori...
Beh ho una brutta notizia per voi: voi pensate di stare dicendo "Ciao bellissima, come sei sensuale, ti va di farmi compagnia?" e, di solito, il traduttore dice qualcosa tipo "Saluti di bell'aspetto, di che tipo di sensazione, desideri tenere un componente?"

E non vi aggiungo agli amici perchè, stranamente, mi contattate 10 secondi prima di staccare!

In più nelle sim italiane stressano con la storia dell'altezza molto più che in quelle straniere. Mi spiace, ma non ho complessi di inferiorità, quindi non mi serve un avatar alto 2 metri.

Infine non verrò a letto con voi in RL.

Me, myself and not you!

I know,
I sound like a bitch.
Sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not.
I mute a lot of people, and rarely give a second chance...

But...well...a lot of people don't know how to use complete phrases

"Your hot. wanna fun?"
"mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"

others say incredibly stupid things

"I need to cum. Can you help?"

others wear facelights and bling bling shoes

Why shouldn't I mute them? I'm not banning them from the game, only from my SL.
I'm not that important, no?

Sometimes I mute avatars because they're boring (girls just wanna have fun), uninteresting, rude or because they make me feel bad.
Or...sometimes...even because I feel them too close and I prefer to be free.
SL is a game to me, a sexy secret garden. I have my rl and my rl relationship.

But they want skype or they stop chatting to you
They want "more revealing pics"
They want voice
I don't do voice. I don't even listen what other say.
Some think that no voice = man.
Go on thinking like that and less dorks will harass me.
Not all girls are comfortable in talking to strangers.
Not all girls  like their voice.
Not all girls wants to moan during sl sex
Not all girls are as good at speaking english as they are writing in it.
I don't voice. If you think I'm a man, just mute and derender me.

And even if you voice, they say you're a man using a voice changer.
If you cam they say you're streaming a video

I've been banned from "Girltown Sisterhood" because I was in a couple of futa/shemale groups.
Linda Latte used this motivation (the same in their notecard):
[2014/03/15 10:39]  Linda Latte: Girltown Note:

 I'm sorry, but you are either a man or a woman who likes to cavort and hang out with male deviates, OR you are a woman who does not read Group Charters. Which is it?? Our robot reports that you have affiliated yourself with a group that welcomes shemales, male deviates, and other such perverts. :( This violates our Group Charter and you pose a RISK to OUR group members. :( It's possible you could "friend" one of these deviate men, or even "partner" him, and invite him to Girltown thinking him a girl. It has happened and has hurt girls here.

 Here are Gtoup Charter words to look for: "shemale, herms, LGBT, transgender, futa, t-girls, sissy boy," and others that should be obvious.

 If you truly choose to align yourself with these deviates, it's fine, and your choice. Please find a home with them then, OK? If you leave the group, plz IM or notecard me, huh? I will contact our robot and tell her you are not a man, OK? :)

 Thank you!

 Linda Latte, Girltown House Mom

"She" could have said "Sorry but we are professional wankers and we don't want to find out we wanked on a 3 legged girl. Farewell!"

I posted a couple of pics of rl me in front of the pc playing sl. A dork managed to say "You photoshopped a printscreen of sl on the monitor in the pic. Let's not argue about obvious"
Oh my god, guys, I won't say "get a life!" because you're not even good at getting a second life!

So hateful

• I hate discos in SL: they are the spammers paradise.

DJs and ppl spend the time spamming gestures and parking av waiting for xploders. Come on, it's a text based game...we could chat even listening to music and dancing! Stop spamming! Otherwise I'll mute you :P
I don't dance. Thanks for inviting me, but I don't like it!
Sometimes people just drain energy from you, even if they are basically nice.

[06:20] cayla Jupiter: i've got to run my puppy out..or else clean carpets later....so if you would like to dance later..let me know
[06:20] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb): I hate dancing (it's in my profile too :P ) but we can chat. see you!
[06:26] cayla Jupiter: i love dancing..but okay....
[06:27] cayla Jupiter: bye
[06:27] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb): bye!
[06:27] cayla Jupiter: lol
[06:28] cayla Jupiter: and you realize the avi's do the dancing while we do the chatting
[06:28] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb): so?
[06:28] cayla Jupiter: just pointing it out....
[06:29] cayla Jupiter: not sure how i rubbed your the wrong way....
[06:29] cayla Jupiter: maybe you like "come here and kneel bitch"
[06:30] cayla Jupiter: maybe not...lol
[06:33] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb): you know, when I meet someone who likes dancing in SL they usually can't believe I don't, so they start telling me a lot of silly and useless stuff to convince me SL dancing is fun. No need to. It's boring. I don't like it. So why bother? Some even tell me "with me it will be different". no, it's not. And I know the avatars dance and the humans chat, that's why there's no need to dance when we are chatting.
[06:33] cayla Jupiter: so what do you like to do?
[06:34] cayla Jupiter: as an alternative to the RL isntilled ritual in SL of dancing?
[06:34] cayla Jupiter: go to a movie?

• Your cam, your mic.

I don't want to see you, hear you, see how you're touching it, hear how much you're horny
I was having sex with a guy. Asked me to voice, I said no. He was ok, with it. The fun went on and then he said "I wish you could hear how much horny you're making me". I said no again. After few mins "I'm almost there, I wish you could hear me cumming". I left and muted him.
How to kill mood very quickly.

• Ppl IMing me to complain about my profile. It's not a democracy!

If you don't like it, don't IM me. There are a lot of ppl with the right profile for you (usually saying "slut to be used")

• People saying "Now ask me something"

If I don't ask you anything it's because I like your questions or I'm not interested in knowing you.

• Ppl who are alone on a couple poseball and invite you to click on the other one

I usually tell them "I don't want to upset the ghost you're fucking with"

• The "Are you lagging too? Why don't we go somewhere else" line

I never lag. Find another way to talk me into coming home with you

• Imposed rp

I don't like rp much. I usually emote but I seldom play a role. But I really hate those who start saying things like "Watches on the other side of the street and sees his wife's younger sister"
or the telepatic ones "Sees a cute redhead and wonders why she's here". I usually answer "Doesn't have superpowers so ignores what you're wondering"

• Others send me a long RP line and, when I answer out of RP, they go on like tanks.

• "If you don't have time we could do a quickie"

I have an idea: I could mute you even quicker

• "lol" used everywhere.

What are you laughing for, dork?? Once in a while it could be ok, but ending all the sentences with LOL it's good for cackling mad cat ladies and hyenas

• They say "Hi" and, after i "hi" them back, they stop chatting.

Why do you contact me if you don't have anything to say?.

• "May I add you so we can chat later?"

They add me and never contact me again

• Compliments.

All girls like compliments but after 3 lines of them I grow bored. Let conversation evolve!

• "IM me"

Why people tell you "IM me"? Don't you know how to send an IM yourself?

• Well don't want to interrupt you

 You're kind asking if you're bothering me, but once is enough! Stop go on saying "I won't disturb you further"! Talk to me!After saying that 2 or 3 times you'll start bothering me for real

• RP... rp everywhere! It's coming from the damn walls!

[2015/04/28 23:52] Jim Rockford (jimrockford) ogles Sera's gorgeous legs
[2015/04/28 23:52] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb): :)
[2015/04/28 23:53] Jim Rockford (jimrockford) wonders what you are doing?
[2015/04/28 23:53] Seraphim (parvati.silverweb) doesn't read minds so doesn't know what you're wondering
[2015/04/28 23:55] Jim Rockford (jimrockford): I meant you are floating around like that but you can see from the bulge in the front of my trousers what I was thinking

You can talk to me without using /me if it's not necessary. There's no need to talk in 3rd person

Furries

Maybe you don't know what a furry is but you've surely seen one: humanoid animals, dressed like humans.
They're usually polite and nice to other people.

I may like demons, werewolves, minotaurs, fauns etc...but "cute" furries aren't really my cup of tea.